SleepyPirate..where are you?

[SweetTooth]

Whose wedding did you go to?

[housewife07]

Hi Kyda! Welcome back! Have fun at the wedding, did you have a nice vacation? I remember you wanted to do a 50s year, did you check out this blog? It is full of ideas:

http://my50syear.blogspot.com/

Danika: How's your grandma doing?

[housewife07]

Where's everybody?! It's so quiet in here I can hear a pin drop!!

[OfficeLover]

hey!! I'm not able to check in as frequently this week It's just been sooo crazy around here! Here is my birth story though, kind of a rough draft but I don't have much time to type LOL

Got the massage on Friday, took 2 evening primrose oils and inserted 2 at 9 pm. 11 pm lost my mucus plug and had a few contractions. By 1 pm, was pretty sure in active labor..aahhhh baby brain! ok, so then from about 1-4 I was having contractions and my bladder was spazzing. I also had started throwing up about every 5-10 minutes at this point. The contractions weren't too bad but when my bladder would spazz and I would contract I would just start puking the pain was SO bad. Blake was dozing from 1-4 and then at 4 I woke him up and said, ok now it's time for you to help me b/c this is starting to get bad with all the puking. I called the doula at 5 and told her that I thought I was handling it ok but I needed some help. She told me to get in the hot shower and then call her afterwards. So, I took an hour long hot shower doing all of my comfort measures like deep breathing, moaning, rocking, thinking of the beach, etc. Got out of the shower and was still puking..drinking gatorade and water after each time I puked and tried to eat some toast with peanut butter...yuck! She came over at 6 and started applying hot packs to my stomach and back (with blake)..tiger balm on my back, aromatherapy..I had my lights off with just twinkle lights on and my spa CD...she checked me when she got there and i was at a 4..so from 6-9 I was doing all the stuff I had learned...birth ball, etc..spent hours on the birth ball. Ok, so around 9:15 I was sitting on the pot, TRYING to pee b/c my bladder was spazzing and would NOT release. Got in the bathtub at like 8 and took a HOT bath to try to get the bladder to release and it wouldn't. Basically I didn't pee for 9 hours. Ok, so back to 9:15. I was on toilet and I told blake, I can't do this anymore, I'm dehydrated in pain, I need to go to the hospital now..and get an epidural, I can't do it..so blake was like, ok honey, ok we wiill do whatever you want (he wasn't supposed to tell me this but at this point I was just like AHHHHH)..Ok, so the doula said, let me check you before we go and she did and I was at a 7. so she said, it's time to go!! SO, we went to the hospital a 3 minute drive..15 min later when I got into the hospital room and they checked me I was at a 9!! Got to a 10 about an hour later, stayed there for an hour while I was waiting for the time to push ( I wanted my body to tell me when to push)...the transition part of labor was the worst. I got to the point where I said, I can't do this anymore...and the doula said, ok, well it's almost over..when you say that it's almsot over...so, started to push and had to push for 2 hours. And, we aren't talking about pushing like with a bowel movement..we're talking pushing like it's the hardest work you have done in your life!!!!!!!! At this point though, the pain stopped and I just had to push so I was relieved I wasn't in pain anymore. When he crowned I didn't blast him out, I really controlled the pushing...and THEN the pain came. The last three pushes I could feel my clitoris tearing and when I was pushing I was SCREAMING. so the last 3 pushes were painful but once he came out, I can't tell you the RELIEF you feel! ahhhhh....I had a 2nd degree tear and a tear on my clitoris which is painful. I didn't feel the 2nd degree tear, just the clitoris tear. They gave me percocet for the past week so that's been nice

I was so happy to have a med-free birth and the key to it for me was having a doula and staying home as long as possible...looking back now a lot of it is a blur and the contractions weren't that bad for me...but when my bladder would do its thing, that was the worst for me. I have always had really bad menstral cramps and this is what it felt like for me.



Breastfeeding was VERY difficult the first 3 days b/c my nips are flat/inverted, but I got the right kind of breastshield and now we are doing it like champs!! Just had to get through the tears and frustrastion and now we're good..



Gavin is so adorable...we have cried together just looking at how beautiful and precious he is. I have been putting pics on FB but I am going to put some labor pics on here so y'all can see how hard I worked Ok, if I think of anything else about the birth I will add it to here! Like I said earlier it's like a blur and this past week Blake and I haven't even known what day of the week it is! hahaha

[housewife07]

Fran, thank you for sharing your story!!! And don't worry, we all know how busy you are!!! Ouch, clitoris tear and 2nd degree tear!!!! Yikes! How are you doing now? May I ask you which positions you tried when pushing? How was your replacement doctor? I have heard that contractions are like bad periods...Mine have been getting worse and worse lately, and longer...Your baby is SO cute! I can't wait to get PG now, lol!!! I'll have to consult my whole team of doctors and alternative medicine practitioners before I do though! I'm waiting to pass that MRI on Wednesday, then I'll see my doc again on Thursday...I'm waiting to see if I'll need surgery for my knee!

[OfficeLover]

I pushed leaning over the top of the hospital bed, on my knees..did that for about an hour. Then, got into the traditional hospital type pushing and felt like I could use my legs more that way to push against the stirrups (but they were more like flat boards not stirrups)...very very exhausting work!
I am feeling like I am getting healed down there lol..still not quite the same but I only had to take pain meds for a week.
The replacement doc was WONDERFUL!!!!! I loved him, I was so happy

How did your MRI go??

What else has been going on with everyone? I feel like I've been in a time warp. Baby is sleeping on my shoulder as I type, lol...I don't have much time for myself, so while he's sleeping now I'm going to put him in his swing and take a shower!!

[housewife07]

Thanks for the update, Fran!! How do your hips feel now? I'm so sorry you teared, oh my gosh!!! I'm glad you loved your doctor and your doula was there for you! It must be quite a lifestyle change to have a baby! Is your doula coming back to visit you post-natal?

I saw my orthopedist again this morning after passing the MRI yesterday and the good news is that I won't need surgery! My meniscus is intact, the problem is the cartilage inside the knee that's thinning out, causing pain, swelling and fluid...So he's positive that PT will cure it and that I only need to see him again if my physiotherapist wants me to. My acupuncturist recommends a PT where I go for acupuncture, as they have helped him with his own knee problems. I'm glad my acupuncturist recommended his wonderful orthopedist to me and that I got a PT rec too! I'm not going back to the other 2 places I've tried for my hip, they suck...I'm going to cancel YMCA because we can't afford acupuncture, PT and swimming at the same time, plus we won't have any time to go anyway. I swam Monday and hurt really badly even though I didn't do much, so I'm going to take a break on that for now.

It's still the beginning of osteoarthritis, which is scary! It's due to my knocked knees and my cartilages are too thin...I hope I won't need surgery like I had on my other knee, but I had a feeling it was different since my pain is not as intense as what I had 4 years ago.

I hope everybody is well! It's been so quiet in here, I hope you're doing ok Danika!

[danikagrace]

FRANNNNNNNNNN!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!! WOW and you had a natural birth GO YOU! I'm soooo happy for you and Blake! I can't wait to see pictures!! I've heard lots of girls say they will have a natural birth and plan for one but you are the first I know who has actually done it!! That's SO wonderful everything went well for you, thank you for sharing your story! It certainly sounds like you did a truly amazing job!! How's it going?? That's great you're breastfeeding ok!!

You guys have all been on my mind and I've been trying to get a minute to get on here for so long! My Grandma came out of hospital and I've been at her flat every day, I haven't even really cleaned all week! yuk! I keep planning to do things 'tomorrow' and it just doesn't happen. Grandma isn't well at all, she has sooo many medicines to take, like 5 in the morning, 1 at lunch, 3 at night, plus painkillers and she can't manage it all herself. I had to take her to the hospital for an emergency x-ray today because she has terrible back pain and they think her cancer may have spread. Well, it's almost midnight and I'm not nearly settled and I have to be at her flat at 9.30am to meet with the dietitian. I've been so tired I feel seperate from my body!! Oh well!

That's great news you don't need surgery hw07! Have you any physio arranged yet? Is there anything you can do do delay the onset of the arthritis? *hugs* As far as our other halfs 'comments' go, I think that they themselves are actually very happy with what we do but get 'tainted' by the outside world that we must feel so deprived and unfulfilled yadayadayada... you know the drill!! And they just don't want us to feel that way, so I think as long as we reassure them that WE DON'T feel that way (and remind them how lucky they are ) they will be fine!

Hope everyone is good!! Will try and get back tomorrow! Sorry I was gone for so long. Love you all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[housewife07]

Danika, wow you have been busy being a caregiver!! You're such a good person!! I'm sure your grandmother appreciates it!! It must be draining though to assist a loved one like this, my gosh!!! I will pray that she feels better!!

You hit the nail on the head! My husband doesn't want me to be unhappy. I think it has a lot to do with the tiny dark space we live in, plus the fact that since everybody works, I haven't had much time to go out and make friends, etc. I am just confused sometimes as to what he thinks as it seems conflicting!! On the one hand, he thinks too many militant feminists are trying to impose their way on every women, and on the other hand, he seems to have a problem with the word "housewife" since it's associated with men telling women what to do (we all know that's not right, but many people associate this term to that...). And I guess he doesn't want to be perceived that way. He told me he'll support me in whatever I choose to do. I just told him that it's a lot for me right now and since we haven't been blessed with the space for a piano here, I haven't practiced in years let alone teach, plus my health issues have really escalated over the years...Before my health issues, I had planned on teaching piano and taking lessons to become an opera singer, but that just didn't happen because I don't have my health, hence why I became a housewife...We are doing good financially, so I don't see where's the problem. I might start teaching again PT though after our kids are not babies anymore, then go on to teaching FT when they go to college (we plan to homeschool), so that we'll be able to have more money for retirement. He's 12 years older and was irresponsible all his life with money, hence why he doesn't have much at all for retirement, so that worries me...But we'll see, one thing at a time!! It'd be a job from home set on my own hours and something I love, music, but it still takes a LOT of energy I'm not sure I'll ever have back...

Anyhow, my knee is killing me these days, it is SO swollen and painful that I can hardly walk even with my cane!! And I can't do my hip exercises every day, so I just rest...I'm going to go back for acupuncture the 17th and I will ask him again that day which physiotherapists he recommends just to be sure.

[danikagrace]

Hey all,

Well I've just got in from my Grandmas and don't have to go back until tomorrow now as long as all is well. Woah I've just had to correct 3 typos just in that sentence so you'll have to excuse me if this doesn't make much sense or is higgldy piggldy, I'm half asleep! lol. It's not really my Grandma so much that takes it's toll, it's time consuming but I can deal with that, what I don't like is my Mum being so mentally draining! She is constantly stressed and stroppy and uppity and I just can't be doing with her. She speaks all posh and 'matter-of-factly' when the nurses or doctors are there and tries to 'instruct' my Grandma like she's a school child, ugh, she's just really been grinding on me the past couple of days. This morning she was just over half an hour late to my Grandmas because she'd been to the dentist and everything was fine up to that point, the nurses and the dietitian are all lovely normal people, we had discussed everything, had a plan everyone was happy with (I said I will do her second feed in the afternoon after the nurse has done the first one my plan being that once Grandma is comfortable and happy, because it's obviously a daunting experience, I can teach her to do it herself), then my mum comes whirlwinding in with her posh voice on and starts telling my Grandma 'you'll HAVE to dothis and HAVE to do that', I felt like saying something but didn't want to in front of the nurse, then she says to the dietitian while stood next to me that if 'someone' says they will do things for her then she is never going to learn -wink,wink, nudge,nudge. ARGH, so the fact that I'm civil enough not to pick at her in front of people is obviously not a trait I get from her.

Oh well, I did do a bit of truth telling afterwards, I told my Mum what I thought and she just said 'well I'm stressed' and I said that I can understand that but she's causing everyone else around her stress and her actions are causing and will only cause her more stress and that if she tries to act calm even if she doesn't feel it then it will probably make her feel a bit better. She said she'll try so we'll see.

Well I have losts of packing and posting to do which I aim to get done today, I also aim to do the dishes and wipe round the kitchen, and hoover this pig sty of a living room! Plus I need to ring the garage, when I got up yesterday I had to change my wheel because I drove over a screw the day before so now I have no spare!

So sorry to hear your knee is so sore hw07, do you have acupuncture for your knee as well as your hip? I really hope you can get some effective physio soon. How's your kitty doing?? Buddy is here next to me acting like a big baby and attention seeking!

How are you getting on Fran? Is Blake having paternity leave from work?

Hope you're all good xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[OfficeLover]

HW07, so sorry your knee is causing you so much pain..does tylenol help at all?? AWESOME news you don't have to have surgery!! whohoo!!!

Danika, so sorry about your g-ma...It sounds like you have been so wonderful to her and helping..don't forget to take care of yourself too. Caregiving is hard work!!

We are doing well...blake went back to work this week..I don't have much time to chat so I will have to write more later. It's hard b/c I don't get much time to do anything for myself! LOL...he eats alot and needs to be cuddled and then when he sleeps I try to sleep or I try to clean a little..not much gets done at all around here AT ALL. It is a MESS. Oh well...

Ok, talk soon!!!

[housewife07]

Danika: It sounds like your mom is having a hard time dealing with her mom being so sick!! Everybody reacts so differently...I'm glad you were able to speak to her and she listened! Good luck at the garage, don't you hate when that happens!

Yes, I do have needles put on my knee when I go for acupuncture, which is good! My cat is doing good, he's also a big baby, lol!! Don't we love our furbabies?

It's so nasty outside, cold and rainy yuck!

Fran: Is your doula visiting you? I've read that they usually check up on you a few times after birth and do some light house cleaning for you...Tylenol helps a little, it's better than nothing!! Yes, I am relieved that I don't have to go through surgery!

[danikagrace]

Hey Ladies,

How's everyone today?

I got some packing and posting done this morning, still have a fair bit to do though, will most likely do it tomorrow to go on Monday. I didn't really get anything done yesterday after pledging it all! But I did the kitchen today, still not hoovered I've not long got back from my Grandmas, I gave her a feed into her tube for the first time today and cleaned and dressed where it goes into her tummy, she felt really poorly so I gave her her night time meds and helped her into bed before I left.

It's been raining really hard here today aswell, starting to get quite chilly too. The rain has thankfully just had a break so I've been out with Buddy without him getting soaked! I hate him coming back wet, especially when Ashley is home because he comes bounding in to see him and before I can even call his name we have a wet couch and Ashley has wet pants! Then thats a whole extra job I don't need!!

Great you're all doing well Fran! How are Dash and Yoda behaving around him?? I logged into my Facebook the other day, I changed my privacy settings and deleted most people (terrible I know lol) I tried to find you but didn't have much luck. If any of you girls want to add me I'm Danika Lloyd.

Glad your cat's good hw07! Yeah I don't know what I'd do without my puppy love! And he gets me out 3 times a day which can only be good!

[housewife07]

Are you the one with the red tee from Manchester? I added you, my network is Montreal!

I woke up during the night feeling like my knee was on fire!! I turned around and put my pillow back to support it, ugh. I still feel like crap, it's swelling up like crazy and I can barely walk at all without major pain today, grr!!! So I'm just going to rest indefinitely so I can better heal later. I hope I can start physio next week.

It keeps raining here too! That's cute your dog can't wait to see your DH, but not too cute when he's still wet I'm sure!! lol

[OfficeLover]

Hey danika, I added you! I didn't see a tree in the background though, HW07, It looks like a pic of danika and ashley...but it did say manchester.

Your poor gma. I just feel so sad for her and for your family. It can't be easy dealing with an illness like this. My gma got more testing on her brain and we are waiting to hear the results.

Dash and Yoda (a.k.a. the devil cats, lol) are actually doing wonderfully around the baby! They act like they don't even care about him!! I'm so happy b/c I thought it would be WW3!!

HW07, the doula has come by several times and called too..we stopped by her house the other day too (she lives 8 houses down) and she said I can call her anytime I need her. She doesn't do housekeeping though, wish she did b/c this place is a MESS.

Today we got out and visited a friend. Gavin slept the whole time so that was nice! I get so nervous thinking he's going to wake up and start screaming and I'll be out and have to nurse or try to calm him down...oh well, I know it's going to happen so I just need to roll with it! Monday will be a big day for us b/c I"m taking him out to eat with me at lunch and do a little shopping